Thursday, April 10, 2008

Escape by Jade Falconer

"Um ... A couple of weeks, I guess. No, wait. It was three weeks. We had sex on opening night." Derek pulled his velvet blazer closer around him and adjusted his scarf before wrapping both hands around the paper cup filled with hot chai tea. It was still chilly, though the sun was bright for February.

"Jesus. You sleep in the same bed, don't you?" Johnny asked. "Three weeks. Damn. I'm not in a relationship and I've had more sex than that."

Derek pouted a little. "We work different shifts. I'm at the theater until kinda late. He goes to the studio kinda early. I keep hoping he'll get another Broadway show, so he'll be working the same as me, but it doesn't seem likely any time soon. He's composing for some independent film, and they all work nine to five." He shrugged. "It's no big deal, anyway." It didn't really feel like 'no big deal' to him, but he didn't want to sound bitter.

"No big deal? Derek. You're a fabulous gay man in a fabulous city. You should be getting laid every night."

Derek's scowl turned into a frown. "Actually, we're kinda in a rut, anyway. It's always the same. I mean, I know Jeremy loves me. He's always so..." He wrinkled his nose. "Tender."

Johnny grinned. "And you want hot, dirty fucking, don't you. Why don't you put an ad on Craig's List? Go have some anonymous fun. It'll be good for your relationship. Do something really kinky and hot and get it out of your system."

Derek had to admit that it was true. He loved Jeremy, but he wanted that kind of passion, that desperation. The more time passed, the more he started to feel resentful about it. He deserved that, and Jeremy wasn't providing it.

"You're thinking about it, aren't you?" Johnny said. "Good. You should. It's not right for you to live a celibate life. It's just not right."

Derek changed the subject. He was thinking about it, and the more he did, the more it appealed to him. In a little while he headed home to shower after their yoga class and get ready to go to the theater. He loved acting, and he was fortunate to have landed his role. He knew he couldn't give it up for anything, because the more exposure he got, the better his career would be in the future.

He'd met Jeremy in the theater, when the sweet, shy composer was working on a play that Derek was auditioning for. Jeremy had spent some time working with the chorus, and Derek had caught his eye. When they'd started dating, they'd instantly become inseparable, and for a time, their schedules matched perfectly. They would make sweet, gentle love until the early morning hours and then lie in bed half the day before they had to drag themselves out.

Now, though, they barely saw each other most days. He wanted Jeremy, but ... he wanted more, too.